By Sue Siebens
It's that recurring discussion about nature vs. nurture. Are we destined or developed? Well, yes—both.
We are destined by the conditions we land in—our family and community's belief systems and behaviors. We are developed by the emotional environment surrounding us, in vetro and onwards.
As we progress through the first 1000 days, we are emotional beings without the cognitive skills or maturity to understand what is happening around us and to us. Each stress we encounter invokes an emotional response because that's our only tool at that stage. Our interpretations will range differently from others. What is only irritating to one child may be life-or-death to another, even if they are in the same family and under what outwardly seems like the same circumstances.
Our internal interpretation is how we develop our sense of the world.
· In an environment lacking efficacy--a sense of personal power and control, and where we are bombarded with physical aggressions, hurtful words and relationship failures, we will be wired to deal with anguish and fury. By developing in such an environment, we acquire the ability to suffer, experience existence with bitterness, seeing a hopeless world.
· A good start in life does not guarantee happiness. But it does shape us to withstand the inevitable assaults of existence better. In a supportive, safe, fun and strengthening environment with few high-stress events, we build a nucleus of pleasant emotions and feel that we live in a gratifying world with minimal triggering situations.
We are inseparable from our environment. When experiencing high stress, in-flight emotions may get suspended. Locked in the body these imprinted emotions are like waiting snares, ready to spring at the slightest environmental cue.
As we grow and expand in experience beyond early childhood, we continue to be jostled by events. It is the unresolved high-stress events in our environment that shape our identity and role in every relationship: intimate, familial, business, community and society. These emerging identities expand from what we learned in our first 1000 days. But we are not bound to this course and disposition.
We need not be driven by environmental triggering. We are capable of astonishing plasticity. The emotional burdens are lifted by resolving the unprocessed emotions of our early days.
It is unnecessary to know any details about what happened to originate an unprocessed memory. Our subconscious possesses all events in our life, whether consciously remembered or not. And that's enough.
From age eleven, we have the mental capacity to employ Emotional Resolution, EmRes. This is funny because EmRes relies on the body's natural ability to resolve emotional difficulties permanently. But like all things, we need some cognitive maturity to understand and follow even the simple basics of EmRes.
EmRes is simple, but its power runs very deep.
We look at what feelings and behaviors have upset us recently, in the past days or months. Using these current triggered situations to access the emotional memory it is processed by the body using a precise application of interoception. Interoception is the awareness of body sensations.
The body knows what to do. We only need to get out of its way.
We work on one emotion-situation at a time. Each EmRes session has its flow, covering one emotional aspect in deep-dive or many related aspects of the emotional experience. Either way, the resolved emotion(s) is released, and the relief is immediate. The environmental trigger is no more. If remembered, the original and past triggering become part of the story, not a resurgence of feeling.
We can release our early environmental injuries and become whole. Our birthright of efficacy, feeling safe and happy, can be ours now.
Are you ready to release your germinal emotions?
1. Many thanks and much respect for the work of Boris Cyrulnik
Photo by Vitolda Klein on Unsplash
Sue Siebens uses Emotional Resolution, EmRes, to work at a fundamental level, where the roots of the illness, fear, and pain can be accessed and resolved. Sue teaches and writes to raise awareness about this new technology so that as many people as possible can find relief and peace in their life. Sue is based in Dallas, Tx, USA.