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Most of the emotional wounds we express in our current life through feelings and behaviors originated in the early months and years of our life. Emotional Neglect is the least publicly discussed or scientifically researched of the Adverse Childhood Events or ACEs. But it is more prevalent and just as damaging as physical or sexual abuse in the long term. Neglect is not dramatic enough to make the headlines. It is difficult to see what’s missing in a child’s life, and neglect often occurs together with abuse.[2] So, it goes overlooked. But the consequences of Emotional Neglect are very real. Current understanding about childhood needs estimates that parents need to provide affection and validation in an age-appropriate way to the child at least 30% of the time. Emotional Neglect is not always about bad parents making bad choices. Often emotional neglect is learned and passed down in a cycle to the next generation. And caregivers may be overwhelmed, struggling, or pre-occupied in other areas. Regardless of the cause, if children don’t get the emotional modeling they need when young, they will learn from peers and adults outside the home. [2] How our parents treated us as children is how we view ourselves as adults. Emotionally Neglected children learn that their feelings and emotions are irrelevant. Dr. Jonic Webb, the author of Running on Empty, explains that this profoundly impacts developing self-identity and understanding/processing emotions in themselves and others. They will grow into adulthood and experience many of the following internal narratives. · Feelings of emptiness · Counter-dependence (the fear of being dependent on anyone) · Unrealistic self-appraisal (not sure of self-identity or desires) · No compassion of self, plenty for others · Guilt and shame; what is wrong with me? · Self-directed anger, self-blame · The fatal flaw (if people really knew me, they won’t like me) · Difficulty nurturing self and others · Poor self-discipline · Alexithymia: poor awareness and understanding of emotions [3] Do any of these stories ring true for you? The self-talk of Emotional Neglect colors every interaction and expectation in life. These are meta-emotions—how we feel about how we feel. We behave and interact with others based on how worthy we feel and how deserving we think we are. How can self-talk change? Our behaviors and interactions led us directly to the emotional injuries that need resolving. By working to resolve the emotions associated with neglect and self-talk, individuals can change their current stories and feelings about their past. Emotional Resolution®, EmRes®, uses current-ish real-life episodes to reset the subconscious triggers that promote negative self-talk and self-esteem. Self-betrayal, self-denial, and any other internal or external action that reflects negatively on the self is fodder for this work. Often it can feel like a swampy, tangled mess of emotions and behaviors. Where to start? One of the many beautiful things about EmRes® is that the end goals and session topics are self-directed. The client chooses. My client, Clara (not her real name), started her EmRes® journey when she had a big decision to make and couldn’t bring her mind to grasp what she wanted. Her fiancé, whom she had been living with for four years, wanted to move forward: get married, have kids, buy a house, settle down into family life. Clara was frozen in indecision. When the subject came up, he would bring up so many positive reasons. She agreed with all of it. Clara just couldn’t commit to saying, “Yes, we can start. Let’s do it now.” Every time they would talk about it, she’d say, “I need more time” and think, “This can’t be right for me. I’m missing something, but I don’t know what.” Clara’s first EmRes® session started right there: a previous conversation with her fiancé about marriage and kids. Her following EmRes® sessions began with conversations or situations where she didn’t feel confident or felt shamed by someone. These included talking to her mother, getting through job interviews, was the offered job right for her, understanding where she wanted to live, did she want children with anyone, etc. Her EmRes® work healed the emotional wounds and triggers that kept her from living and feeling fully Clara didn’t have a diagnosis of Emotional Neglect, as far as I know. She was successful in business and a quiet, kind, and caring person. Anyone would love to have her as a friend, wife, or daughter. But it was clear through session conversations that she had no sense of who she was inside, what she wanted, or how to express her opinion or emotion without fear of reprisal. Through a series of Emotional Resolution® sessions, Clara found her voice. She realized what she wanted and under what conditions they could happen for her to be comfortable. As she found her voice, Clara also discovered herself and was happy with the person she is. At the beginning of one session, Clara shared that she had been singing and playing guitar privately for years. At a small local pub the previous evening, a friend invited her on-stage to sing with the band. She hesitated a little, then joined the group for a couple of songs. Then with their encouragement, borrowed a guitar and sang on her own. They loved it. She loved it more. Clara was thrilled with her new confidence in sharing music. She wasn’t interested in a music career but loved the joy of a shared musical experience. She would try it again soon. It was just an outward manifestation of the new and beautiful changes that were going on internally. A wallflower no more! Using EmRes® to work through the consequences of Emotional Neglect uses recent events to access past wounds. EmRes® doesn’t need to know or understand where or when the injury happened, just that it did. This kind of emotional hygiene will have profound effects. Each session brings relief, even if multiple sessions are necessary to bring on large internal shifts in confidence and contentment. Are you ready to change your self-image and self-talk? References 1. What is Developmental Trauma / ACEs, https://www.porticonetwork.ca/web/childhood-trauma-toolkit/developmental-trauma/what-is-developmental-trauma 2. The Hollower: Childhood Emotional Neglect and Its Effects, https://www.themeadows.com/blog/the-hollower-childhood-emotional-neglect-and-its-effects/ 3. Running on Empty, by Jonice Webb Ph.D. with Christine Musello, PsyD About Sue Sue Siebens is an intuitive holistic healer based in Dallas, Texas. In her practice, she uses techniques that work at a fundamental level, where the roots of the illness, fear, and pain can be accessed and resolved. Sue teaches and blogs to broadcast and raise awareness about these new technologies so that as many people as possible can find relief and peace in their life.

Effective self-awareness and self-control, aspects of emotional intelligence, are key to connecting with and managing our emotions in the present moment. We all have areas where we lack these skills. Often what we perceive as our identity and emotional reactions are different than how others perceive us and our actions. What we characterize as hard-working with a passion for order, might appear as controlling and perfectionist, or caring for others as not respecting other’s boundaries, or being sensitive as emotionally distant. [1] There is a disconnect between our subconscious and conscious awareness and conduct. Our internal world is subtly out of sync with our external reality. These are our EMOTIONAL BLIND SPOTS. They are also displayed in the little paradoxes that we keep manifesting: [2, 3, 4] Having the same troublesome relationships with different people Ending up in the same vexing job situation even after changing jobs Being a habitual people pleaser, often at our own expense Never (rarely) apologizing, accepting blame or admitting flaws Ducking real intimacy with jokes or other diversions Being a loner because social situations are never exactly right, they don’t feel right Assuming lead roles even when it is not our project or our house. Getting angry or disappointed in the face of criticism These repeated social situations just seem to happen. We do not know how we got here, don’t want to be here, but here we are again. The results of our actions conflict with our conscious wishes, but apparently in direct correlation with our subconscious desires. The current research in neuroscience has shown that emotions are culturally based and socially learned from our first families. We develop emotional concepts using the words as shortcuts to simplify and organize our emotional experiences. Emotional concepts help us pool the many aspects of anger, for instance, into concept groups. Concepts help us more easily recognize emotions in ourselves and others. So, a person that is red-faced, screaming, jumping up and down, and appears miserable, according to our culture’s body and facial cues is probably angry. And likewise, a person that is red-faced, screaming jumping up and down, and appears to be having a pleasant experience doing so is probably super excited and happy, if that is acceptable behavior for a happy person in our society. Emotional blind spots are emotional blocks or areas of underdeveloped emotional growth that we carry subconsciously. If we were never taught or were exposed to some emotional management behavior by our emotion teachers, then we cannot express those emotional concepts. For instance, if our parents did not filter their thoughts when talking to others, it is likely we also lack filters and we overshare or offend others without knowing what we said. Blocked emotions happened as a result of a specific trauma that put the kibosh on emotional learning and awareness Identifying our emotional blind spots are paramount to our overall happiness. They are the bumps and obstacles in our life. They create situations where we are emotional but not emotionally connected to the reality of our situation. These are the moments when our Emotional Intelligence is lacking. How do we take the blinders off? Understanding the “why” is not as important as “what”. What matters is noticing those behaviors and situations where we are out of sync with reality. Where are we: avoiding people, conversations, or situations because they might make us feel uncomfortable? in denial about anything consistently in the same unsatisfactory social situation, job, relationship expressing emotions in an over-the-top fashion being misunderstood, attacked or devalued All these cases are produced by subconscious emotions that are buried in the body. Emotional Resolution is a natural method of resolving emotions that we cannot see. And it does so with permanent effect. By working with the blind-spot situations and behaviors, Emotional Resolution eliminates the emotions that block self-awareness and our use of self-control. Some elements of past traumas are embedded in the sensory pathways of the body. Subconscious memories linked to those traumas are aroused when a similar situation is encountered in our lives. In anticipation of similar outcomes, the connected sensory pathways are charged and the emotion reexperienced. When the prediction is wrong, we have an emotion that is not in sync with our reality. When the triggered emotion is not consciously processed by the mind, we have a blind spot. Emotional Resolution removes emotional blocks and subconscious triggers, allowing us to employ self-awareness and self-control naturally and without effort. Once the subconscious emotions are resolved, we can quickly learn new emotional concepts, vacant from our previous experience. They will feel like the skills we have always had. We will use them naturally, without even noticing, like breathing. An Emotional Resolution, EmRes, session addresses an emotion-situation individually. It uses the body’s natural ability of interoception, feeling internal sensations, and a proprietary method, guided by a professional. Sessions do not require personal history or retelling of personal details. There is no retriggering or trauma or flashbacks. Clients are fully conscious and self-aware. Emotional Resolution sessions are a pleasant conversation between client and EmRes professional to bring resolution to the buried emotional imprint and eliminating the blind spot. Are you ready to take off your blinders? References How Blind Spots Plague Even The Best Leaders, https://www.lollydaskal.com/leadership/how-blind-spots-plague-even-the-best-leaders/ Seeing Your Emotional Blind Spots, https://marthabeck.com/2011/11/seeing-your-emotional-blind-spots/ Blind Spots, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/anger-in-the-age-entitlement/201805/blind-spots Conquering Emotional Blind Spots Is Challenging, But Worth It, https://www.huffingtonpost.ca/entry/blindspots-personality-resolutions-big-ideas-2020_ca_5e14aac2e4b0b2520d287324 About Sue Sue Siebens is an intuitive holistic healer based in Dallas, Texas. In her practice, she uses techniques that work at a fundamental level, where the roots of the illness, fear, and pain can be accessed and resolved.  Sue teaches and blogs to broadcast and raise awareness about these new technologies so that as many people as possible can find relief and peace in their life.

Stress. Everyone agrees that the continuous long-term stress we are experiencing due to the Coronavirus outbreak has many negative effects on our life, including · Fear and worry about health and the health of loved ones · Changes in sleep or eating patterns · Difficulty sleeping or concentrating · Worsening of chronic health problems · Worsening of mental health conditions · Increased use of alcohol, tobacco, or other drugs [1]. During the middle ages, Bubonic plague also known as “the black death” was pandemic across Europe, Africa, and Asia. In France, the main caretakers for the sick people were nuns and mentally disabled persons were employed to carry away and bury the dead. They were heavily exposed to this disease due to this work. They did contract the plague and were symptomatic, but their survival rate was much higher than other groups of infected people. Why? One reason put forward is that they lacked a heightened stress response when they got sick. The nuns had an undefeatable faith that did not leave much room for fear and the mentally disabled were likely ignorant of the threat. It is true that as we are given an adverse diagnosis, we can become “scared to death”. When we experience anxiety, fear, anger, or stress, precious energy leaves our body. Energy and resources that could be used by our immune system to help regain strength and health. There are internal neurological and physiological reactions to prolonged stress and are characterized by three stages 1. Alarm, a flight-or-flight response that raises hormones that increase physical responsiveness and metabolism for immediate energy to fight off the threat 2. Resistance, a continued state of arousal that may upset homeostasis and harm internal organs leaving the organism vulnerable to disease 3. Exhaustion, after prolonged resistance the body’s reserves are depleted and breakdown occurs. Diseases such as headaches, insomnia, high blood pressure, and cardiovascular and kidney diseases are associated with Stress Exhaustion phase.[2] It is clear that we need to eliminate anything that is a chronic stressor to stay healthy. It is especially important to stay healthy when COVID-19 supplies a heightened challenge to our bodies. Of course, “our elders and people with pre-existing conditions are more at risk”. However, just hearing that phrase over and over again, on the news and repeated in our conversations, is creating an even higher stress condition. Panic is at the ready when they get symptomatic or get diagnosed. This strongly impacts their ability to heal and recover! We don’t even have to be in that group to be freaking out these days. How can we reduce our stress? What can we do to keep our immune system at its full power when we need it to fight off the novel viruses? Release the stress. Not through coping with the stress! But by releasing the stress through eliminating the emotions and feelings that underlay the stress and keep it in place. What does that mean? It is right and true to be concerned and take precautions and preventions to not catch the virus, if at all possible. That’s a sane and normal response. It’s not an emotional reaction. Precaution alone is not stressful. Not any more than brushing your teeth is stressful when you pull out your toothbrush to prevent tooth decay, and eventual dentures. Any “stress” (fear, paranoia, anxiety, threat, conspiracy, etc.) that we feel about the virus, the social restrictions, or the behaviors of others is about an emotion that is driven by the circumstances. New understandings in neuroscience show us that emotions are created by the subconscious when it perceives a connection between current situations and past traumas that were unprocessed. The unprocessed emotion is lodged in the body as a sensory pathway. The connection between current and past can be vague, but the subconscious tries to prepare us to meet the challenge with an emotional response. The emotional response is to light up the embedded sensory pathway, creating a pattern of physical sensations that is interpreted by the brain as emotion. Most of the time the emotional response is not in sync with the person’s reality. The vast majority of the time, its prediction is wrong. There may be something to pay attention to, but no tiger is charging out of the woods. If we were to reset the subconscious link between the situation and past trauma, the triggering event would not happen. There would be no emotion clouding our response and there would be no cascading stress response to injury our immune system, which we need so desperately right now. It turns out that the Emotional Resolution method does just that. It uses the current event stimulus to eliminate the buried emotional component and crushes the stress reaction. It resets the subconscious—no more trigger. No more dampening pressure on the immune system. An Emotional Resolution, EmRes, session is like having a calm conversation with a friend. The EmRes professional guides without triggering past trauma or flashbacks, without knowing personal detail or history. The results are permanent. Are you ready to strengthen your immune system by resolving your emotions? Reference 1. Coronavirus Disease 2019 (COVID-19), https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/daily-life-coping/managing-stress-anxiety.html 2. Stress, https://www.csun.edu/~vcpsy00h/students/stress.htm Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash About Sue Sue Siebens is an intuitive holistic healer based in Dallas, Texas. In her practice, she uses techniques that work at a fundamental level, where the roots of the illness, fear and pain can be accessed and resolved. Sue teaches and blogs to broadcast and raise awareness about these new technologies, so that as many people as possible can find relief and peace in their life.

While it is sensible to take reasonable precautions during any influenza outbreak, pandemic or not, anxiety and fear that causes you stress can affect your immune system. There is plenty of scientific studies and evidence that show how high stress, no matter the specific cause, will put us into fight-or-flight. If you have something/somebody to fight or flee from, then okay, having more resources go to muscles and breathing and less to the rest-and-repair system is probably a good thing. "However, when stressors and 'feeling under attack' remain constant, the fight-or-flight reaction stays turned on, over-exposing the body to cortisol and other stress hormones. The cells of the immune system (and other body systems) are unable to respond normally and produce levels of inflammation which increase the risk of further health issues.[1]" So, just when we need it the most, our immune system is getting knocked down by the constant barrage of new and unanticipated scenarios in so many aspects of our lives. How does fear show up in our lives? Our responses to fear manifest as ESCAPE, AGGRESIVENESS, SHUT DOWN, and CONTROL We often have these fear-based behaviors without even realizing it. Look closely at the behaviors and reactions in your daily life. · Escape: When do you want to avoid something/somebody or “I don’t want to deal with it”. · Aggression: Which situations make you feel angry, frustrated, snappy or punch a wall? It can also be a passive aggressive action like back-handed compliments, blaming others or playing the victim. · Shut down: What situations hold you back or restrains you from doing or thinking something. “I want to do something, but something INSIDE OF ME stops me”, “I don’t dare”, “I am feeling overwhelmed”. When do you feel stuck or held back in relationships, money, career, etc? · Control: “In which situations do you become overbearing, try to control yourself or be bossy to someone else?” Is there a routine or activity that is necessary in order to relax, like wine, meditations, a spa visit, yoga, a walk, the gym? All of these behaviors have underlaying fears. With Emotional Resolution™, EmRes™, we can access our body’s innate capacity to resolve these brusing emotions. By removing the fear/stressful emotion permanently, your mind, body and immune system are re-balanced with your current reality. Alternatives? Otherwise you can practice popular coping skills to set aside the emotion for a time. Here are some commonly used methods. · Take a time-out. Practice yoga, listen to music, meditate, get a massage, or learn relaxation techniques. Stepping back from the problem helps clear your head. · Eat well-balanced meals. Do not skip any meals. Do keep healthful, energy-boosting snacks on hand. · Limit alcohol and caffeine, which can aggravate anxiety and trigger panic attacks. · Get enough sleep. When stressed, your body needs additional sleep and rest. · Exercise daily to help you feel good and maintain your health. · Take deep breaths. Inhale and exhale slowly. · Count to 10 slowly. Repeat, and count to 20 if necessary. · Accept that you cannot control everything. Put your stress in perspective: Is it really as bad as you think? · Welcome humor. A good laugh goes a long way. · Maintain a positive attitude. Make an effort to replace negative thoughts with positive ones.[2] The is nothing particularly wrong with these coping mechanisms. But they are a temporary fix. They help us set the emotion aside, tamp down the fire, or difuse the moment. But the next time a fear trigger is presented, the emotion will return to torment us and depress our immune systems. We all need to stay as healthy as possible. The best suggestion, is to remove your excess fear and anxiety using Emotional Resolution™. Are you ready to get rid of the fear? Be fearless, but not foolish. Reference 1. Why stress is the enemy of your immune system 2. Tips About Sue Sue Siebens is an intuitive holistic healer based in Dallas, Texas. In her practice, she uses techniques that work at a fundamental level, where the roots of the illness, fear and pain can be accessed and resolved. Sue teaches and blogs to broadcast and raise awareness about these new technologies, so that as many people as possible can find relief and peace in their life.

“I know I need to return this phone call (or something similar), but, before I do...I’ll cruise FaceBook first.” “I’m feeling a little down today. Let me check my Instagram feed to see how many people liked my recent post.” “I need to start this project but let me check my Twitter account first.” “I got so much to do today. I’ll just check Amazon’s daily deals to see if I need anything.” The internet and social media, in particular, are attractive hangouts. There is no doubt about it. Developers and marketers spend a good deal of time to make sure that apps, blogs, and websites are “sticky”, meaning they attract and keep our attention. It’s the “economics of attention”. The more time spent on their site, the more likely you are to get what they want out of you. It seems harmless enough. After all, no one is forcing you to buy. But that’s not all that’s going on… The attractive stream of content works on your brain like the most addictive drugs. It keeps you happy while you’re on them and creates a desire for more when you are away. This is especially important if you are procrastinating or trying to avoid some tasks entirely and using the internet/social media as your refuge. It’s all about pleasure-seeking and pain avoidance behaviors that are a natural part of being human. And it’s the biggest timewaster in the modern world. When you want to do something, but end up doing something else, there is an emotion in play. It’s procrastination, avoidance, delay, and hesitation. You can feel vaguely like your dodging your project or it can be a completely unconscious side-step. Whatever you call it and no matter the details, we’ve all done it a million times, in a million different scenarios. “Yesterday I needed to answer emails that have been sitting in my inbox. But when I opened my laptop, my Facebook newsfeed came up first and I scrolled through memes for a while. I lost track of time meme-ing. Then I had to go to a meeting. I never did get emails answered. ☹ I really did want to answer them yesterday and get them off my plate. I made a point of having time to get on the laptop and do it. Then I got derailed! It’s so frustrating!” The tricky part is that it doesn’t feel like an emotion is in play. We just wanted to do one thing and end up doing something else. No emotion is felt…at least not in the normal sense. The buried emotion driving procrastination is there, stuck in the body. But the subconscious hasn’t detected a sufficient “environmental stimuli” to trigger the buried emotion to the surface where we can feel it. The emotion is misrepresented from a feeling to a behavior. The desired behavior/task is short-circuited to some new activity and we are otherwise seamlessly engaged with no real notion of how we got there. How do we work on an emotion that we don’t feel? The emotion happens in the unconscious moment before the “response behavior”—the misdirected action, like meme-ing on Facebook. The emotion is real. It just has to be accessed properly. Emotional Resolution has a method to isolate this “unknown emotion” and eliminate it During their Emotional Resolution session, the procrastinator identifies the moments that led up to the shift to the response behavior (ex: surfing the internet). The Emotional Resolution practitioner guides the session to the hidden emotion and the emotion will be released. The short-circuit, the connection between the elusive emotion and the subconscious mind’s tricks of misdirection, is broken and the procrastination is snuffed out. YEAH! Those emails will get answered! Generally speaking, eliminating procrastination using Emotional Resolution needs the guidance of an Emotional Resolution professional. The process requires a specific technique to trick the subconscious into accessing the hidden emotion. It’s difficult to achieve using Self Emotional Resolution, even if you are a practiced Self-EmRes user. So if you have things to do, that you genuinely want to do, but can’t seem to get them done, then find an Emotional Resolution professional that can help you get rid of procrastination’s hidden emotion. Sue Siebens

Erectile dysfunction, is a relatively common condition, particularly in older men. But it can occur in any male past puberty, young men in their 20s and onward. It is believed that over 30 million men in the US experience erectile dysfunction. It’s hard to collect accurate numbers on its prevalence since many men will not volunteer such information during their medical check-ups. But if sales figures are telling, then $330 million was spent in 2000 on erectile dysfunction. Erectile dysfunction can be a sign of an underlying medical issue. Physical causes of erectile dysfunction range from vascular diseases (atherosclerosis, venous insufficiency) and metabolic diseases (diabetes, hormones and renal failure), damaged nerves due to surgical procedures, injuries and neurogenic disorders (Parkinson's, Alzheimer's, MS, stroke), and medication’s side affects. But if all the physical reasons have been ruled out, it’s time to turn to emotions and their effects on the problem. Performance Anxiety It is common in new relationships that a man might be eager and a little nervous about an upcoming sexual encounter and want to impress. Usually, the problem passes as partners become more comfortable with each other and in their sexual relationship. But performance anxiety is thought to be one of the most common emotional causes of erectile dysfunction and a major component in persistent issues due to its self-perpetuating nature; performance failures lead to a belief in more inevitable performance failures. The anxiety builds in a deadly spiral of worries and self-created obstacles. Stress Not all causes of erectile dysfunction are directly related to sexual intercourse. When stress is a prominent force in a man’s life, it can have a significant effect on sexual performance. Issues at home, in the office or periods of financial uncertainty, can affect mood, desire, and hormone production. Alleviating stress and worry can remove the distraction and help with being fully present and connected during intercourse. Depression A common, but less discussed, symptom of depression is erectile dysfunction. Depression and erectile dysfunction tangle together to make each one worse. Loss of self-esteem, disturbed sleep, poor eating, and overall fatigue are common symptoms of depression and all these contribute to a lack of interest and confirmation for feeling bad about oneself. Some anti-depressant medications also make impotence worse, which helps neither situation. Relationship Concerns If a man is not interested, due to over-familiarity or concerns within the relationship, it can contribute to libido problems. Likewise if there is confusion about sexual orientation, this underlying cause can affect desire leading to self-identity and esteem issues that ultimately run to erectile dysfunction. Erectile Dysfunction can result from a Matrix of Emotions. Erectile dysfunction can be anxiety-provoking and disorienting for any man at any age. A common pattern in the emotional causes of erectile dysfunction is that they are self-perpetuating. The loss of erection, libido or desire, depression, and uncertain relationships create a vortex of self-doubt and hesitation that starts at the first thoughts of an upcoming sexual encounter. Resolving the Emotional Vortex of Erectile Dysfunction Emotional Resolution (EmRes) removes the emotional triggers that feed the self-doubt and hesitation. It also works on depression, stress and performance anxiety. EmRes is an emerging technique that is uniquely positioned to help erectile dysfunction. During short one-on-one sessions with a profession, either in person, on the phone or via online meetings, the emotion that cloaks and guards a man’s erectile dysfunction is resolved and released. There is no triggering, no personal information need be shared, and any original trauma does not need to be known or shared. This is not sex therapy. 95% of the time, the session addresses the emotions leading up to the sexual encounter, not the encounter itself. We find that the limiting emotions occur well in advance, sometimes hours or more before, as the man envisions the upcoming interactions and starts to dwell on possible failure. At this early stage, the root emotion to be tackled starts a crescendo of increasing fears, culminating in either failure during or avoiding the encounter altogether. By working at the start of the cascade, the scope of discussion is diminished, relieving the client of what can, in some cases, be a very uncomfortable conversation for him. With this fear out of the way, more men step forward to reveal their anxieties and worries and resolve the emotions leading to erectile dysfunction. Learn more about EmRes (link: https://www.emotionalhealthinstitute.org/emotional-resolution) Are you ready to let go of the emotions that are wilting your performance? Sue Siebens Certified EmRes Practitioner

It takes two to tango. If you need an adversary to hold up one side of an argument for you, someone will show up and carry on the other side of the dispute. As soon as you let go of the difficulty–the anchoring emotion, the other person will “lose interest”. Read the complete blog right here!

The Hygiene of Life: our pathway to happiness To live a balanced life…that is a life of health, success, and happiness, we must think in terms of the full integration of the 6 dimensions of our personal life: our physical, social, emotional, intellectual/mental, occupational/financial and spiritual. For the most part, we understand what it means to take care of ourselves in each area · Physical wellness: How you care of your body - eat right, clean and exercise the body daily, get adequate sleep, take care of injuries right away. · Social wellness: How you interact with others - create and maintain quality relationships with others, use healthy communication, boundaries and create a healthy support system. · Intellectual/mental wellness: How you cope with the demands of daily life, greet and recognize reality and meet your desired level of intellectual stimulation - expand your mind with new ideas, concepts, and viewpoints, which lead to fresh understandings and opportunities to share your gifts with the world. · Occupational/financial wellness: How satisfied are you at work and with your financial standing – create flexibility and make adjustments that relieve these stress points, find a work, family and leisure balance. · Spiritual wellness: How connected and purposeful do you feel with a grand plan – be in harmonious relationships with other living things, establish a direction and purpose, connect to something that is larger than you. This includes living according to personal ethics, morals, and values. · Emotional wellness: How do you feel inside? Learn to cultivate an awareness of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors and manage them in a healthy way. This is the Hygiene of Life... Taking personal responsibility for the tasks that keep our life in order and on track. Most of us are on a continuum in each area. Some days and years are better than others. We all have a good deal of clemency for ourselves and others when we slide to the “not so healthy” end of any given area. We pardon and accommodate broken legs and cancer, menial or stress-filled jobs, mind-numbing media, and hobbies. As we drift thru life, we are not particularly alarmed when we find our self or others isolating from social events or being in debt. We are quite cavalier about other peoples issues. We assume they will figure it out….or they will find a resource to help them relatively easily. It is common to be taught, either at home, in schools, clubs, and in faith groups, the basic and advanced skills needed in most areas of wellness… Except for EMOTIONAL wellness... To date, our emotional education is completely informal. We gather emotional cues and patterns from watching and listening to those around us, mostly from our original families. Their behaviors are the most deeply understood and cultivated messages, much more so that any graceful platitudes about how to act that they may speak or try to teach us. When someone has emotional “failures”, displaying “negative” emotions for others to witness, it attracts bigger attention and causes bigger problems than in other wellness areas. Disruptive emotions can spill into, effect and, pollute anything going on in the other wellness areas. Built-up stress levels and uninvited direct inter-personal pressure can cause our emotions to erupt into displays, behaviors, and patterns that cause harm to every other aspect of wellness in some way. Many times, emotional displays are not socially acceptable and we are expected to regain control of ourselves and make amends. Historically, unless there is a clinical problem, there is no guidance or help to regain this control. We just shove down the feelings of the moment. Then later, we act out toward others or indulge in addictive behaviors to soothe the emotional beast. But now we have EmRes! Emotional Resolution (EmRes) is a simple protocol or set of steps, that is used to eliminate an emotional response, permanently. EmRes utilizes a natural process that resyncs the body-emotion-subconscious links to the “triggering”, howver safe situation. Briefly, the subconscious mind senses that the current situation resembles a past disturbing situation or trauma. In order to prepare you, the subconscious mind predicts upcoming events and generates corresponding physical sensations that will be acted upon by the mind as emotions, anger for example.So now you are angry, even if the current situation was misread and anger is the exact wrong reaction to have at the moment. The cascading effect of anger is to blame the people and environment around us. So again, we try our best to control it by breathing, acting out, going to the gym, meditating, praying, shopping, drinking, etc. But if we were to take the time for EmRes, either in the moment or later in a session, the link between the subconscious mind, the situation, and the emotion will be broken. That situation and very similar ones will no longer prompt the emotional need from the subconscious mind. Ta-Dah—no anger. EmRes doesn’t just work with anger. It works with every emotion that we consider negative, disruptive, disturbing or unpleasant. Fear, trauma, anxiety, PTSD, emotional blocks, separation, abandonment, paranoia, procrastination, inhibitions, and on and on. It turns out that pleasant emotions like love, joy, happiness, etc, can’t get stuck like the unpleasant emotions. Our natural life is fueled by pleasant emotions and they keep us in a state of contentment and in an appropriate relationship with our current reality. If contentment is missing in your life, removing the negative and troubling emotions will restore it. One of the great benefits of eliminating disturbing emotions is the mental clearness that comes with it. When you are no longer flooded with emotion, there is much more mental space to assess and find the reasonable and appropriate action to address the situation in front of you. Even though the new response takes the same amount of time, it feels like there is time for a pause to consider options, instead of just launching into improvised action. It’s a sweet deal. EmRes can be employed in 30-minute sessions with a professional (https://www.emotionalhealthinstitute.org/practitionerdirectory) on the phone or in person. You can also learn to perform EmRes for yourself, on yourself when in the moment of the emotion (https://www.emotionalhealthinstitute.org/sessions-and-training-for-individua) Most people find a combination of sessions and self-EmRes works best. Working on emotions develops its own priority. Usually, the big-stuff, the most problematic issues in your life are tackled first. What has come up for you in the last weeks and months? Those emotions are active in you now. They can easily be addressed with EmRes. Going forward, other emotions and situations will come up to work on. And as the work continues, we get calmer and happier, finding joy and peace where it was absent before. It’s a wonderful journey to undertake. Emotional wellness spills over into the other areas of wellness in our lives: our physical, social, mental, financial and spiritual wellness will start to open up as well. This is the Hygiene of Life: integrating all dimensions of our being into wellness. It is wellness that we all strive for, but that few can even imagine. Are you ready to clean up your emotions? Sue Siebens

We'd like to share a great Blog post written by Certified EmRes Practitioner Sue Siebens! I ran across this meme yesterday and I LOVED IT! Did you really have a bad day or did you have 10-20 minutes where you let your thoughts run undisciplined which led you to a bad vibe that you let carry you away. Come on… you run this [show]. Pay attention. Read the whole article here!

We've all heard the advice about how to deal with emotions A good friend's favorite advise is "Don't forget, feelings are real, but they don't necessarily reflect reality." Whether he was telling me or I heard him telling someone else, I would smile. Knowing its truth from easily recalled memories where my emotions got the better of my understanding of the current situation and I went off the rails, in the moment, or stoked down the immediate explosion to vent later. "Feel your feelings. If you feel them fully and completely, they will go away". I heard this numerous times from a mentor and coach. I'd try to let the emotions gently get "full", force them to get "full", recall them in meditation and breathe into them to get full, pull them up in a daily review and think my way thru them. Nice mental exercises. I may have gotten to some new insights, but the emotions remained. “Take action in your situation that will get you out of every feeling that way again". This can go from powering thru to total avoidance. Engaging in emotional self-care is good, but these don't actually "fix" the emotion. "Shift your focus away from the feeling", Relax, Breathe, Count." Control techniques continue on to meditation, exercise away the stress, take yoga class, have a glass of wine….or two, think positively, write in a gratitude journal, take a pill. Yeah, the emotion is still waiting to erupt. "Just Let It Go!". This is actually my personal favorite. It presumes that some emotional pattern, one that you've been carrying since forever, can just be removed like an old coat. Just take it off, hang it up and walk away? I don't think so, LOL! We live on the "positive" emotions like Love, Joy, Contentment, Inspiration, etc. They are the emotions that make life as beautiful as it can be. These are the emotion we want to keep and want more of. It’s the uncomfortable emotions that we don't want. We spend a good deal of time trying to ignore, subdue and control them. They are uncomfortable! Early on in life, we learn a myriad of strategies and techniques to defeat difficult emotions, either by mental tricks in our own head, manipulating others to meet our emotions needs or by ignoring them/shutting them down. Anything, but feeling them. It turns out that we've been going at it all wrong! Emotions in our mind are the echo--the reaction-- to an awareness of physical sensations in our body. Each emotion has a physical signature of 2-3 sensations. For example, a tight gut and rapid heartbeat might mean Anger or Fear. The sensations arise because our subconscious brain has detected some attributes in our current situation that is similar to a previous situation, sometimes the situation is from infancy or earlier. Our subconscious believes that we used "anger" to successfully navigate that situation, so it now prepares our body with "anger" so that we'll be ready for events that is sure to come. In essence, our brain predicts that we need to be angry to be successful in the current moment. It is helping us out by preparing us with the precursor physical sensations of anger. This is very similar to the way our blood pressure gets higher if we think we are going to have to run in the next minute. It’s a prediction and preparation cycle to assist our survival. So how do we get off the prediction/preparation cycle of emotion, when the emotion is clearly not in alignment with the current situation? Emotional Resolution, EmRes, is a precise protocol to resync the subconscious connection between the emotion and "triggering" situation. All we have to do is feel the feelings! AH, but not the ones in our head. We must feel the physical sensations that are produced in our body. And to be effective, the sensations must be active in the body and we must be in a comfortable "enough" state to close our eyes. The body will do all the work of metabolizing the sensations and the subconscious brain will automatically release the tether between the emotion and situation. We just have to give it the space and a short amount of time to do it and the emotion will be gone, permanently. It's really that simple. It's just that as human beings, our conscious mind knows it's uncomfortable and finds ways of slipping back into the tried and true strategies we've collected over a lifetime. We quit focusing on the sensations in our bodies and before we know it, we are back in our head grousing about what happened, labeling the emotion, etc. BUT when EmRes is followed, with practice or with the help of a EmRes Practitioner, it's crazy how well it works. My clients have had amazing positive changes and breakthroughs, that have left us both surprised and astonished. Here are some examples Fear of driving fast (over 50 mph) and fear of driving over bridges Sales person conflict and frustration when caught between the customer and the company, sales performance and making the numbers Anxiety during interviews or when talking to people of authority Fear of being shot or killed Migraine Procrastination and avoidance Fear of meeting new people, fitting in, making new friends and on the other side, fear of being lonely/anxiety when alone and therefor making bad choices when creating new relationships Anger or rage over "nothing", at home and at work Fear and paranoia at work Sports and performance anxiety, also fear of reinjury after a long recovery Weeping in grief for two years, Feeling guilty about circumstances surrounding the death or how they should have been treated better, separation anxiety in grief Anger at being passed up for a promotion, Jealousy in relationships Being uncomfortable in own body; forgiving an unforgivable self-image And many more EmRes works equally well in-person or over the phone. Are you willing to let go of your unwanted emotions? Sue Siebens Certified EmRes Practitioner

It seems that everywhere I look, there are workshops, apps, videos there to improve my life, make me a better man, more efficient, more connected. Because you know: you’ve got to have a better life, make more money, be a “Boss”, be a better person… So Yes! We take workshops, follow Gurus, Webinars, we read the latest book on spirituality, Self-Improvement, watch videos of exciting talks on YouTube - drooling on how awesome it must feel to be Tony Robbins; reading inspiring quotes that pop up on our Facebook page (those are just awesome!) … We are trying so hard, so damn hard!! I am no expert. But what if... we are trying too hard? Read More About Stop Trying So Hard: https://www.cedricbertelli.com/blog/stop-trying-so-hard

Seeking appears to be central to the human condition. At our core, we aspire to be at peace with ourselves, with others, to attain contentment. Like a compass, this search for contentment drives our lives and our behaviors. It fuels religious fervor; the burgeoning self-help industry; workaholism; the legal and the illicit drug industries; it funds tens of thousands of yoga retreats annually and over 30,000 new users of meditation apps per day in the United States alone. As we move through our days yearning for contentment, we experience stress, anxiety, frustration, shame, physical discomfort. We accept these as an inevitable part of life. Maneuvering through these obstacles, we constantly look for inner peace; we look for it outside of ourselves, convinced that eventually—with perseverance and some good luck—we will find the practice, or the community, or the philosophy which will open the door to our contentment. Then, we will feel fearless, healthy, safe, and fulfilled. Read More About Feeling Your Way Back to Peace www.cedricbertelli.com/blog/feeling-way-back-peace